I describe myself as an introvert yet, like most human beings, I am not all one thing or another. I have elements of extroversion, strong elements actually, and they have a name for that. (Of course they do because humans MUST put a name to everything. god forbid something might just BE, in a generic sort of way, kinda like god. Yeah, that’s a rant for another time.) The name is ambivert. Read about it or not, as you wish, but it just means what I said in the first two sentences.
I have been living as a hermit for maybe, 8 years now, and it has taken its toll in my energy levels. Physically, emotionally, physically, spiritually. I draw my energy in all those areas from being around people. I am NOT an emotional vampire, tho I have been victimized (for lack of a better term) by them.
Through my maternal DNA I have inherited the talent/skill of being able to read people, more commonly known as psychic/medium. Like any talent/skill, be it music, math, art, dance etc, it must be practiced to maintain any proficiency. Thing is, you need to be around people to read people. And I’m not. And I miss that connection. Those connections. I miss that energy.
Even physical energy – when I am in a high energy place my physical energy levels increase, I absorb the energy of traffic and hustle and bustle. It is exhilarating. It is joyful.
Absorbing energy, whether from people or places, is also exhausting – emotionally exhausting as well as physically exhausting, so being able to pull back and isolate is necessary for my mental and physical health.
But being in almost complete isolation is also a bad thing – for me. I’m used to having these psychic connections and I miss them. Whether it was sharing a connection with a passing stranger or someone who has passed over – I enjoyed those connections. They weren’t always happy, to feel someone’s confusion, hurt, anger can be draining, and sad. But I got to absorb positive energy and peacefulness and joy.
I miss my connections.